What I have Learned Thus Far

As I pack for Christmas vacation, I realize this is the first vacation that I don't feel so anxious to head for the hills. I love my family, don't get me wrong, but the new family I have built with my friends here in Springfield is hard to tear myself away from. Since most of them have left, it is a little bit easier. I also wanted to blog one last time before the new year. I will be heading for Texas tomorrow morning to spend Christmas with my brother and sister-in-law and neph-dog, Rusty. THAT, I can not wait for.. I miss them entirely. I also will miss where I have been. This semester has grown me and shaped me so much, and it is so unfathomable to have a better year than the last.. every year I pursue God.. Each year I encounter difficulties, each moment God calls me back to Him.. each day I come back to Him, even when I don't understand why. And He then romances my soul and helps me to see His truth.. and then wow does it open my eyes and allows me to open my heart to others even more. I am so thankful for the friends that I have lived life with this past semester..My close friends lyndsay, amanda, aby lee, lindsey, amelia, gretchen, liz, dave, kaleigh, debra, brenna.. and probably more I am leaving out.. but you guys have really transformed who I am as a woman.. because God has spoken through you to me, even when you don't realize it. I have seen God through your tears, in your laughter, in our trials, in our worship, with our hands and feet, with your words..I am so thankful for you and your discipleship.
God has also shown me another kind of love this semester that was foreign to me until 3 weeks ago. Entering into a christian relationship with a man who pursues God fervently is like a breath of fresh air. Through JB protectively making sure my faith is strong and not stagnant is just another way of Jesus saying.. "you are worth greater things than this world, you need to keep choosing me, emily". Learning and growing with Jonathan about selflessness and obedience to God in the hard things.. is taking work.. but one of the most amazing experience I have had on this earth. I feel like God is testing us and holding us accountable each day- but that is how I know God is in this as well. What a strange, inconceivable love our God has for us.

Looking out the window of my Larkspur Apartment I silently wish for the snow to follow our car all the way to Texas, leaving a trail of beautiful white ash. But I know I am really wishing for my friends and boyfriend to not leave my head and heart while I am away. Since my best friend has moved out, it has been a little bit scarier and more like real life. I keep catching myself reminiscing and wishing for yesterday.. but then God gently nudges me forward.. telling me tomorrow will be so much better.

What I am most thankful for.. is Jesus. I get emotional just imagining God giving of himself in the most humble and lowly way. I keep thinking of what Ryan said at church last week.. about how Mary and Joseph were nothing special.. all they were, were obedient to God's will.. and look at what He let them experience? I wish for my relationship to be like that.. I can't even begin to start thanking God for redeeming me. I know everyone says this on Christmas.. but we should remember this every day of our life and live accordingly. How amazingly blessed we are that we have a God who forgives us for any and every sin by Jesus' blood... We are no longer tied to this earth's standards, and we no longer find out worth in worldy things or people. We are free to love because we are loved. I can't wait to feel/hear/see God work during my break.. and I can't wait to hear the stories that you guys will have when we see each other again next year...